What I could really do without these days

1. Unnecessary Pregnancy Drama aka: Quad Screens

I don't know why they do these - they just give a pregnant woman more stress and drama (like she needs any more). High margins of error mean pregnant women get readings that there is a problem with their child when more than 90% of the time it's not the case. Most doctor's offices, I'm told, explain this to their patients so that said patients can opt not to have this screen done. Mine did not. And in my ignorance of all things related to pregancy, I was told they were going to do my "blood work" that week, and I believed it was routine - something every pregnant woman has to go through -so I gave them my blood. Guess what? It came back positive for Downs - but as I pressed the nurse as she attempted to tell me that I needed further testing - she admitted that most are actually false positives and that I had a 1 in 781 chance of having a baby with Down Syndrome. Depending on the stats you look at EVERY woman has a 1 in 733 -800 chance of having a baby with Down Syndrome - so why put a pregnant woman through this unnecessary crap? I'm not going to abort my baby and I'm not about to let them poke around me anymore to see if this test was right or wrong. Lesson learned - I will not be taking the Quad screen for any subsequent children I may have. Thanks for the drama - I could've done without it.

2. Rude Kids

Okay, I'm not a mother yet - but what the heck is going on with kids these days? I can't stand it when I hear a kid sass his parents - I just want to go over and pop that kid in the mouth. Is it really so hard to discipline your child or teach them manners? This Halloween I got so upset because more than half the kids who came by didn't say "Trick or Treat" they just stood there with their bags open and quickly turned and walked away once the candy was dropped in their bags - no "thank you" "see ya later", "kiss my foot" - anything. I even had one kid (aged about 8 or 9) actually reach into my candy bowl to help himself because I was busy dropping candy in other kids bags at the time. WHAT THE HECK!!??!!

3. Tailgaters

I'm not talking about the parties - I'm talking about the people who ride your bumper even when you are going over the speed limit. This guy did that to me yesterday - I would've moved over for him, except I was turning left in about 500 feet. As he speedily passed by on my right side - I had to smile I little. His brand new truck had a huge crack in the windshield, several dents on the doors and a large dent on the back bumper....I wonder how it got that way?

4. Belly watchers/touchers

I'm pregnant - you don't have to remind me every five seconds. I know my belly is getting bigger - I know my clothes are getting tighter - please don't chase me down to tell me these things. This woman I work with actually waited until I finished a conversation with my boss, followed me to my office where she waited for me to get off the phone to tell me "You're looking very pregnant today." Thanks. Don't get me wrong - I love my baby bump - I love that others love my baby bump....I just don't think it is necessary to hunt me down to tell me so.

Coupled with the baby belly watchers are the belly grabbers - STAY AWAY FROM MY STOMACH! I don't mind if you ask - but patting my stomach/rubbing my belly without permission may result in you losing a few fingers. I had a lady do that to me one time when I WASN'T pregnant - because she thought I was (thanks rumor mill at church) - it was mortifying then and it still is now - just because there's a baby in there doesn't mean I have ceased to be protective of my personal space. Please don't be offended - again, I don't mind if you ASK - but think of it this way - would you like for someone just to walk up and start patting YOUR belly? I didn't think so.

Now on a more positive note - my next appointment with the doctor will be the gender appointment. It was supposed to be next week, but Erick is having me reschedule so that he can be there (I don't know why ; )) - so I'm unfortunately going to have to wait a little while longer to find out. I'm itching to buy little baby stuff too. I was in Target this afternoon and I saw the CUTEST little outfits for baby boys and girls - I know as soon as I find out I'm going to be running to the nearest store to outfit my unborn child with the most adorable stuff I can find - that kid is going to be spoiled rotten.

What I'm loving these days

1. Stretchy Jeans

Okay so I'm not big enough for maternity clothes yet - but Old Navy has these AWESOME stretchy jeans designed for the first six months of pregnancy. They have a large elastic band around the waist and make jean wearing just a bit more comfortable. I can still get into my old jeans, but sitting down in them isn't the best feeling in the world - so stretchy pants rock my face! But that's not even the best part - these pants don't have buttons or zippers! At first I was like "oh, that's stupid"...haha...little did I know I would be praising the maker over and over again as I made mad dashes to the bathroom. These pants were definitely designed by a woman who knows exactly what it means to have a tiny person jumping up and down on your bladder 24/7. I've had too many close calls to be worrying about really stupid things like zippers and buttons.

2. Football

Who knew that football was so fun? I like to watch the Super bowl every year and I knew the basic gist of the game - but since Erick has been doing his fantasy football thing I've really gotten into the sport. Erick just educated me on what a "first down" meant and now I just can't get enough. Some of you may think I'm totally retarded for not knowing that before now, but hey, I knew players ran from one end of the field to the other to score a touchdown and the other team tried to stop them - that's more than a lot of girls know...seriously....have you seen Beauty and the Geek?

3. Flea Markets/Antique Malls

Before we left on vacation, my pal Mandi and I visited a Flea Market in Montgomery. It was awesome and it totally took me back to my childhood days spending Saturdays with my grandparents at their "shop" in a similar antique mall.

4. Community

Can I just say I love Joel McHale? Community is hilarious - Talk Soup has always been hilarious. Now I have two shows that make me laugh hysterically starring Joel McHale. Add Chevy Chase to the mix and that crazy Spanish teacher and that strange Arab kid and I'm totally hooked.

5. Zombieland

*Gasp* I like a Rated R movie. Okay, I like several Rated R movies. (Hot Fuzz, Shawn of the Dead, Gladiator -just to name a few). Zombieland rocked my face like it hadn't been rocked in a few years. The last movie that made me laugh this much was the aforementioned Hot Fuzz. This movie has everything: drama (well supplied by Abigail Breslin), suspense, horror, romance, comedy, and TWINKIES! If interested in seeing this movie, I suggest you go buy a pack before viewing - I didn't - and I've been craving a flippin' Twinkie ever since. D@&* you Hostess and your clever product placement!!

6. Rosa's Cafe/Julios Burritos

Alright, I've always loved Rosa's. But go without it for a while and you'd be loving it all over again too. Mexican food in Alabama sucks...hard. So last week when we ventured to San Angelo I ate at Rosa's...twice...and I reveled in every minute of it. Freshly made tortillas, yummy sopapillas. Who could ask for more? Well, I wanted to stop at Diego's for a burrito, but thought I'd try out Julios - pretty darn tasty too. I had guiso - which, for some reason cannot be found outside the state of Texas - at least not in Alabama and DC. Maybe Rosa's and Julios is "fast" Mexican food - but even with that distinction, it's still better than the crap they try to pass off here at "Tex-Mex" restaurants.

7. Chocolate Milk

Chocolate Milk is manna from heaven. Period.

8. E-bay

I love e-bay - especially now that I've got a little one on the way. I have gotten great deals on books I had when I was a kid, including Dr. Seuss and Disney. I'm also loving that I can get a complete 9 piece crib bedding set for $40 when they usually run $175.00 +. Saving money rocks!

9. Rio getting the Olympics

I'm not so petty to be happy about this just because it's a "slap in the face to Obama" as some right wing talking heads have proclaimed. I'm happy that Rio got the Olympics because South America has NEVER hosted an Olympics before...EVER. As anyone who knows me will tell you - I am an Olympics junkie - for the two weeks that the Olympics are on you can be sure that I am focused on absolutely nothing else - I really don't know how I survived in school with this problem...but there it is. Vancouver 2010 - bring it on - I am ready for my next fix.

10. My husband

This is a no-brainer. Erick is always going to make this list - but I think as we progress in our marriage I just love him more and more. Why? He really knows me - we're a good team - he makes me laugh - and he's awesome.

Okay so this ended all cheesy and gooey - sorry folks - but I think we all need a bit more goo every now and then.

Brain cells? We don't need no stinkin' brain cells!

So Erick and I have been doing our best to fit in to the Southern way of life. He's decided Auburn will be his "team" (they ask you Alabama or Auburn when you first move here), we've had boiled peanuts, we've discovered what muscadines are, and we've eaten some pretty dang good BBQ. This week we learned about the infamous "Skeeter" truck that drives around and sprays for mosquitos. We were over at our pals' house - Jack and Mandi - and heard what we thought was a street sweeper. They corrected us in our assumption and told us about this "skeeter truck"

Now Jack and Mandi moved here about the same time we did - but they live in a more populated area of Prattville than we do so they have experienced a few more local things than we have. One day, while outside talking to their neighbors, this truck drives by releasing its mosquito killing toxins in the air. This didn't phase the locals, who remarked to Jack and Mandi that the folks who lived in their house before them used to run everytime they saw that truck coming. They thought this was very silly of them because as kids, they used to chase the "skeeter" trucks with their bikes. Somehow this just didn't come across to any of us "foreigners" as a safe and healthy passtime...kinda like when I moved to Texas and saw kids on sleds tied to the bumpers of cars driving down the ice covered roads during the first Winter I spent there.

Last night, the "skeeter" truck made it by our neighborhood. Needless to say, Erick and I did not feel compelled in an attempt to "fit in" to go out and chase it down.

If my baby comes out with 2 heads, I'm blaming Tricare.

Hello. My name is Gretchen and I HATE Tricare...and while we're at it, military medicine in general.

I took a home pregnancy test over a month ago and up popped two lines. I called the base clinic and was advised to come in for a "walk-in" pregnancy screening. I went in, gave them their lab sample, walked into a room, was weighed, had my blood pressure checked, and then was handed a letter saying "Congratulations New Parent". That's how I "officially found out" - no discussion, no explanation - just a generic form letter. How grand.

The nurse came in next to talk to me about what I needed to do next. It was pretty much me asking what I needed to do because I was directed to the letter I received. She sat there as if she was bored out of her mind, answered my questions and then stopped talking altogether. After a period of awkward silence I asked "Should I go? Is that it?" She said "Yeah, that's it" without bothering to even look at me. Wonderful.

So per the instructions I was to call my PCM for a referral to a local civilian OB. I checked with friends to see who was good, called my PCM and left a message first thing the next morning. I received a phone call at close of business that day from my PCM's nurse that resulted in the following conversation:

Nurse: I see you have requested a referral for an OB
Me: Yes, that's correct.
Nurse: What is the reason?
Me: I'm pregnant - I just found out and was told to get a referral from my PCM.
Nurse: Did you come in for a pregnancy screening?
Me: Yes, I did that yesterday.
Nurse: Did you see the nurse?
Me: I saw a nurse, she gave me this letter and told me to get a referral.
Nurse: We have no record of your visit.
Me: Well, I came in - how do you think I got this letter?
Nurse: Well, they didn't indicate it in your file...ummm, who is it that you want to see?
Me: Dr. Lawhon - he's with Physicians for Women
Nurse: Alright, well is there a way you can come in tomorrow?
Me: No, I'm flying to San Antonio at 5:00AM.
Nurse: Um, okay, I'll draw up your referral and send it out tomorrow.

Naturally, I thought that my referral would be waiting for me when I got back the next week. Wrong. So I called the Tricare Referral Office and discovered they had me listed to see some other doctor from a completely different group than the one I requested. So, they told me that they would change it. Four days later, I received my referral - for the wrong doctor. I called again. They told me, "oh no - it's changed in the system, that letter was just sent out before the change was made." Fair enough. So about a week later, I received another referral letter. Without opening it, I set it on the counter at home....well, the next day happened to be trash day and I can only assume that dear Erick, in his role as an exceptional husband (which he is by the way), threw away what he thought to be junk mail. No harm done really, I work right next to the clinic so I went over to the Tricare office later that week to get a new one. Unfortunately their system was down, but they told me the easiest thing would be to call Monday (today) and have them fax the referral. I'm all for efficiency, so I agreed. MAJOR MISTAKE.

So I called first thing this morning and was told "yes ma'am we have your referral for Central Alabama OB and Associates." WRONG! Here we go again.

Lay off me - I'm STARVING

So pregnancy, I'm discovering, is an exhausting and grueling exercise. I know I'm only just getting started - more fun yet to come - but I feel like my body is in training for the Boston Marathon.

I didn't believe I was pregnant when we first found out at the end of August. For two weeks I had been going through I severe case of what I believed was PMS. I was bloated, tired, hungry, my back hurt, I was moody, and I knew, I just knew that this month's visitor was going to be a doozy. But it didn't come, and it didn't come...so for kicks I bought a pregnancy test. Totally skeptical I took it - bracing myself for the disappointment that always followed on previous occasions. Almost immediately, two little lines popped up - I was completely dumb-founded. Of course, Erick and I were excited, but it was just so strange after two years of nothing to suddenly have something.

Well, now the fun begins. Since that blessed day I have had a time trying to get used to my ever-changing body. One sister at church told me that it's like "you're climbing Mount Fuji everyday". I would have to heartily agree with that statement. While in San Antonio I had to sit through a day of seminars - by 1:00 I was completely catatonic - by 5:00, I don't think I could've told you my name. I am very grateful that I work part-time because when I go home and eat lunch, I pass out before I even realize what's happening and wake up wiping the drool from my face and wondering why Erick is already home.

Nausea has been my constant companion for a couple weeks now. It comes and goes throughout the day - but thanks to some wonderful advice I have learned how to get the better of it...for the most part. There are times when it just comes up and gets me - and those are the days I feel like I'm dying. It's awful to be sick and tired....and hungry.

Which brings me to my next - food. I can't get enough of it. I feel like such a porker. I just went out and bought a whole mess of healthy snacks - fruits, veggies, crackers, etc. But it is so hard to resist some of the good old fattening stuff. I was having a particularly nasty case of nausea on the road and decided to stop at Sonic for an Orange cream slush ( citrus is supposed to help). Featured prominently on Sonic's menu was their Chili Cheese tots. Suddenly I got a hankering for them - I was good and avoided them - but I kept thinking about how yummy they would be. A few nights later, I made Erick make me chili cheese turkey hot dogs - it was the best meal I think I ever had in my life. Seriously. How sad is that?



I am determined to exercise everyday - and so far have been doing a pretty good job. Even if it's just 20 minutes - I do it. Mostly I try to do an hour on the treadmill or the elliptical - running/walking. It helps with my nausea and gives me a little more energy, surprisingly - though not much. I still am completely drained in the afternoon and usually have to nap, or force myself to do the simplest things.

I have been told that all of this tiredness and nausea disappear at the end of the first trimester. I am looking forward to functioning like a normal human being again. However, I am concerned because already I'm up at least twice in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom - I can't imagine what it's going to be like when the shrimp gets bigger - I may just have to look into Depends.

THAT"S MY PURSE!!!! I DON"T KNOW YOU!!!!

On Thursday I left dear ol Alabama for San Antonio to attend the CAP National Board. While I have many opinions about the Civil Air Patrol and it's members I will refrain from that diatribe and just give you a glimpse as to what they are like from the following:

About two weeks prior to my trip, I received an e-mail from a member which stated the following: "Are you going to be at the National Board? I'd love to have the opportunity to talk with you" I was a little discomforted by this e-mail as I had no idea who this gentleman was, but I answered: "Yes, I will be there. I am going there to learn about the program and meet the members that I will be working with".

Imagine my shock, surprise and distress when on Thursday, the day I arrived, as I was trying to take a nap after traveling since 4AM, I received a phone call in my hotel room:

CAP member: Uh, yes, is this Gretchen Clayson?

Me: Yes, this is she

CAP member: Gretchen, this is _________, you said we could meet - I'd really love to ask you some questions about the DDR program.

Me: Yes, sir, I remember telling you I would be at National Board, but as I told you before, I'm here to learn - I don't know what I could tell you.

CAP member: I'm sure you can answer my questions.

Me: Okay...

{awkward silence}

Me: Well, are you going to ask me your questions?

CAP member: I really would like to meet you - can't you come down so we can talk? I really want to meet you.

Me: Sir, I'm really tired, I've been up since 4AM and you just interrupted my nap - there's a mix and mingle tonight - are you planning on attending that?

CAP member: Well, I wasn't planning on it - I'd really like to just ask you these questions.

Me: Wait, How did you get my room number?

CAP member: I called the switchboard, I, I, I don't know your room number, no- are you going to come down?

Me: No, I'm sorry, but I told you before I don't know much about the program - again, there's a mix and mingle tonight.

CAP member: .....ugh......I guess I can go to that.

Me: Great.

Incidentally I did not attend the mix and mingle because it turns out it was just for members. The next day this creepy old man approached me in the seminar and cornered me - it was him. He sat right in front of me and then in between seminars as I was preparing the handouts in the corner, I looked up and to my horror, saw that he was taking pictures of me...and only me.

Apparently this is pretty standard for CAP folks - apparently some volunteers (as we call them) will even follow you to your hotel room or to the bathroom. They are a strange bunch.

A little of this and a little of that

This is going to be a strange post because I have a couple things on my mind that I just need to get off my chest and throw out into cyberspace.

First, how strange is it that the people in the South are SO religious that they close restaurants on Wednesday nights for church, but are open on Sunday?

Could you possibly be on your way to hell?

Second, the Jackson family. Okay I have seen more about Tito and La Toya and all the other Jackson siblings in these past few weeks since Michael died than I ever did the ENTIRE time he was living - is it me - or are they capitalizing on his death a little too much?

Speaking of Michael Jackson's death - I never was fully convinced that Michael was a child molester. Granted, I thought he was strange and given the option, I would never let my child stay the night at his place, but I honestly never believed he really did it. But does anyone remember the media circus that revolved around Jackson BEFORE his death? He was the weird "Jacko" who walked out in face masks and dangled babies from balconies. They abused him for YEARS like they did Brittany Spears when she went all psycho, shaved her head and hit that car with the umbrella. Movies made fun of him, musical groups made fun of him, TV made fun of him and suddenly he dies and his music is being played on every radio station, in every store, in every mall, all across America - people who called him a molester are suddenly mourning his passing like he was the best friend they ever had. Can we say guilty conscience?

Ted Kennedy. I'm sorry - I know the man just passed, and I know that he had a stellar career as a Senator and should be remembered as such. However, I am becoming increasingly nauseated by these articles that are dismissing his involvement in the death of Mary Jo Kopechne as a "mistake" that cost him the presidency. This is the death of a 28 year old woman we are talking about!!! A woman, who by police accounts, was probably alive for 25 minutes after the car went in the water - yet Kennedy walked past two houses, went to his hotel, called his lawyer, talked to his cousins about the accident and waited to make a police report the following morning, AFTER her body was found - in a car that had the scratch marks on the upholstery proving that she was still alive while Kennedy swam to safety and left her there to drown. He said he tried to save her life and was too frantic to call the police, okay fair enough - but his cousins knew what happened - why didn't anyone call for help? I am willing to look past this part of Ted Kennedy's history for the sake of being respectful towards the deceased - besides, he will face his judgement soon enough, as we all will. The stone in my shoe with this whole entire episode, however, is that it is being reported as the "irresponsibility" that cost him the presidency. I think it's disgusting to minimize and dismiss the death of this young woman as the "bump in the road" of his political career. But that's just me.

On a more positive note - I saw Julie and Julia last night with the girls and it was, in the words of James Lipton, "a DELIGHT". I have never been more inspired to be a better cook in my entire life....even when I burned steak so badly that I almost had to break out the fire extinguisher.

By the way - I am sorry this post was a little heated - I must be hormonal or something.

The Basket Lady finally came!

Okay, so we've been here, what two months? When we moved in I was told by several people that a lady comes by EVERY new person's house with a basket full of free stuff - coupons for free hair cuts, free facials, half off car treatments...you name it's in there. Well, she never came by my house - I was beginning to take it a little personally. (Actually I thought she was an urban legend...or in this case a rural legend)

Totally random: But did you know "Johnny Lee Miller is a hot piece still?"

But today, in the midst of cooking dinner VERY quickly for Erick because he had a priesthood meeting to go to - she came!! I got tons of stuff and she was VERY VERY nice until a certain point in our conversation about getting settled:

Basket Lady: Do you need help finding a place to worship?

Me: Oh, no - we're all set, thanks!

Basket Lady: May I ask which church you chose to worship with?

Me: We're LDS - so we're right there off of Cobbs Ford Road

Basket Lady: *tight lips* Uh huh *looks away and puts fingers to her mouth*

I think it's so hilarious and weird that people ask you about where you worship as soon as they meet you - I mean, I guess it was the basket lady's job to make sure we could find a good church - but still it's just a little strange to me. I giggle about it all the time - especially when I catch their reaction - it makes me want to pull out a pass along card or hand them a Book of Mormon to freak them out even more. ; ) I love it!!

Incidentally my chicken got a little overcooked because of her visit - but hey, I got free stuff!!! Isn't that what we're all about these days?? ; )

Stranger Danger!!

Does anyone remember the Safety Kids? My mom was a Brite music fanatic so I was raised on the cautious warblings of those "protect yourself" toons. (Ha! Toons/Tunes!) I loved the Safety kids - I still do, in fact. (Erick likes to make fun of me when I sing "Designer Genes" in the shower.)

I LOVE the Safety Kids!!!

My sister told me the other day that I was too guarded because I told her that talking to a complete stranger on the phone once and then letting them crash at your place for the weekend while they were in town, probably wasn't the safest thing to do. Hello - I saw Taken and if you ask me, those girls were stupid...especially the blonde chick.

Anyway - the thing that has got me freaked out here in Alabama is everyone is all about your business. I get it, they're friendly. But for a Yankee like me who grew up on Unsolved Mysteries, America's Most Wanted and other such terrifying TV shows, it's a little unnerving when say, the President of the Prattville Choir parks outside your neighborhood at 6:45 AM hoping to catch you on your way to work....AND sat out there for fifteen minutes waiting for you to do so. Why? Because he wanted to invite you to a party and he misplaced your phone number and address. Okay. Fine. But even though he is nice old man, I'm a little concerned that we're possibly being stalked. Okay, maybe not. But still - if my mother ever found out, you can bet that she would be calling me every fifteen minutes to make sure I WASN'T being stalked.

So is it good or bad to be a little paranoid? I don't know - but I do know that I sleep much easier at night with my alarm system and the knowledge that my husband is currently being trained to fight like Liam Nieson in Taken - so Ermin - WATCH OUT!

Birthday Fun!

I wasn't too excited for my birthday this year - 29, not such a great age - I mean, that's it for the 20s, I'm looking at adulthood now.  However, my one consoling thought was that this year I'd be surrounded by family in Nauvoo - a place I have always wanted to go.  Well, as some of you know, that little plan fell through because of (surprise, surprise) the military.  Erick was going to be in training all summer so vacation plans were a negative.  

While it totally sucked to miss the family reunion, Erick made up for it  - on Thursday we went to see Harry Potter, on Friday we went to a Mystery Dinner at the antebellum Buena Vista mansion next to our neighborhood, Saturday we went to Six Flags in Atlanta, and then Sunday (my actual birthday) he made me an awesome Steak and Lobster dinner.  Not to mention he bought me a new rice cooker since my old one died, two Lego X-box games, and two very cute and fabulous purses.  

The Mystery Dinner was way fun because I was the rich grandma and Erick was my mobster son.  There were about 40 people there and it was just a riot - I was younger than 99% of the people there, but I was the oldest character.  (I attributed it to my great plastic surgeon).   We met some nice people there who own a berry/fruit farm and they invited us to come out and pick fruit ( we did, their peaches are amazing!).  Erick's character was the black sheep of the family and the obvious villian (though he was not the murderer).  He spent the evening bribing and blackmailing other guests and leaking stories to the reporter.   

The Giovannis - Mother and son

Six Flags was packed full of people so we didn't get to ride much, but what we rode was WORTH it.  There we rode the best and scariest ride I have ever ridden: the Superman Ultimate Flight.   On first appearance it seems like no b

ig deal.  Yeah, you're laying parallel to the ground underneath the track, but how much of a difference can that make?  Well folks, it makes a HUGE difference.  The second they lifted up our feet to set us looking straight down at the platform, I started screaming.  You can't see the track, all you see is what's beneath you, so as you are 

climbing the first hill, all you see is ground....getting further and further away.  When we went down the first hill into an actual head first dive , I realized that this was the closest I ever wanted to get to sky diving.  I thought I was going to come out of the harness and the girl beside me must have thought she was too, because no sooner did we start diving, then she grabbed onto my arm and held on as tight as she could.  It really did feel like flying, the sensation was amazing.  

Holy Flippin' Schnikes!

I still wish we could have been in Nauvoo, but I'm grateful for the wonderful weekend my even more wonderful husband put together to make my birthday one that I will always remember.  

We're definitely not in Kansas anymore, Toto

Adjusting to life in Alabama has been fun.  First off, everyone is SO polite and the first thing they ask when meeting you is not where are you from, not why are you here, but:  Are you affiliated with a church yet?  

Also - see if you can spot the difference in the following dialogues:

Cashier:  What you want?

Erick: Ah, yes we would like the 10 piece bucket meal - grilled

Cashier:  We don't got no more chicken - if you want chicken you gonna have to wait 30 minutes.

Cashier: May I help you?

Erick:  Yes, we would like the 10 piece bucket meal - grilled 

Cashier: Alright sir,  oh - wait Sir, the chicken won't be ready for another six minutes -is that a problem?

Erick: No that's fine.

Cashier:  Would you like a drink while you wait?  

Pictures of the new house

Here are some pictures of the new place for those of you 

who aren't cool enough to have facebook.  

I'll post some more with furniture when my house

stops looking like a cardboard factory.  

Driving through storms

Well folks we made it to Alabama after a wonderful weekend spent with the family in PA.  The trip however was a little rougher than expected.  

It's only 13 hours from PA to Alabama - a piece of cake compared to our usual 26 hour trek to TX straight through.  We only planned for one day of driving  because we had a walk thru on our house the next day in the morning.  I saw nothing wrong with this plan until I realized somewhere around Roanoke, VA that there would be no trading off on drivers as Erick and I were driving two separate cars.  In the words of Ron Burgundy, I immediately regretted this decision.

Besides being completely fatigued from driving we had to deal with torrential downpours the ENTIRE way.  It was raining so hard in some parts that we could not see to drive - so needless to say - that lengthened our driving time considerably.  (It also contributed to more frequent potty breaks for myself - no need to think of Niagara Falls when the entire sky is falling!!)

Do YOU have to go yet?

After 15 hours we finally made it to Prattville, and let me tell you that LaQuinta was the best thing I had ever seen in my life.  We also have a jacuzzi tub and a king sized bed in our hotel room so it made it even more sweet.  

I wanted to take it with me when we checked out

I'll post more about the house when we get settled in our new place.  

The Anacostia Ward

Anyone familiar with Washington, DC will know that there are just some areas to which you just don't venture. Unfortunately for us, Bolling AFB happens to be in one of those areas. While we are somewhat sheltered because of guards and 295 - the sounds of many sirens can be heard at all times of the day over here.

Last Sunday we were told that our Ward boundaries had been reorganized and that Bolling AFB would no longer be a part of the Capitol Ward (in Suitland, MD) but instead, would be attending the closer Anacostia Ward located on what seems to be the most violent street in DC - Southern Avenue - as it is ALWAYS in the news for high speed chases, murders....you get the picture.

I was not too concerned because Erick and I, as you know, leave DC in two weeks - so this change does not affect us too terribly much. However, I was excited to see what this ward would be like. I knew that the Anacostia Ward was composed of first generation members...we're talking just a few years in the gospel and I knew that they had the highest baptism rate of any ward in the stake.

We arrived at the building and I was astonished that they had 10 missionaries assigned to the ward. The people were lovely - I nearly got hugged to death in Relief Society - and the facilities were, I thought, nicer than the Stake Center we used to go to. I loved the ward and the people - they were great. I mean, how often in a regular sacrament meeting does the ENTIRE congregation answer back to the speaker? The coolest part of this experience was that the missionaries take turns standing outside during services to "keep an eye on the vehicles". Love it!

A new tradition is born...

I hope everyone had a fantastic Easter - I sure did. There is nothing greater than being able to spend quality time with your family on a weekend my grandmother terms, "the holiest of the year."

We had two Easter dinners this year (Saturday night with dad, Sunday with grandparents). Dad came up with that compromise to satisfy the insatiable desire to entertain at their home and also observe the tradition of Easter at grandma's. Overall, it was a great compromise, albeit an expensive one on the caloric side.

Though this was a change from our normal Easter festivities, this is not the new tradition of which I was referring in the title of this blog.

No, that change came in the aftermath of our Easter egg hunt - which in itself was a riot - Han even got in the action - carrying the egg he found in his mouth with Erick proudly looking on. Many of the young-uns in my family don't like hard-boiled eggs (Erick included) so while we were enjoying the beautiful weather, someone got the idea to start a game of "egg ball". Basically softball with an egg, only if you hit the egg you had to replace it with another egg. We all took turns at bat and when the eggs ran out, went to using actual balls. It made for a messy, but enjoyable afternoon.

Sweet Home Alabama

Okay, so most of you know we received our orders for Maxwell AFB, AL.  What you might not know is that we are leaving DC much sooner than we had expected - May 23!!!  We have to report on June 1 and since we bought a house down there last weekend (another thing you might not have known) we want to get there a little early so that we can do all the closing stuff and get somewhat settled before Erick begins training for his new job as an instructor. 

I had never been to Alabama before this weekend.  The only thing I knew about it came from second hand accounts - one particular account involved squirrels and eating them - so I really did not know what to expect.  Well folks, it's a beautiful state, and the people are so nice - it's just amazing.  I don't know, maybe I've lived in DC too long, but when I stopped for gas right after we crossed the border, the clerk inside began asking us about our whole life story and then told us how much longer it was to Montgomery and places we should look for - I walked away thinking, "man - all I went in there for was to pay for gas and buy a pack of gum!!"  

When we got to Montgomery and began our house search, it was the same, people were so friendly - everyone seemed to know each other and they treated us like they had known us for years.  Can we say southern hospitality?  

We will be living in a suburb of Montgomery called Prattville, a nice community of about 32,000 people - they even have a community choir!!  Our house is in a new development - off the beaten path - and our house backs up to a small lake and there will be a fishing area/picnic area on the farther shore.  

We have pictures that I will post when I get around to it - I am so busy right now - but I will definitely post pics of the finished product.  I am so excited about this move...although I finally met one of our neighbors in DC - a little boy of about 8 who walks his dogs on the path behind our house - and he is sad that we won't be here through September (when he moves) because he likes to talk to us and likes to see Han and Luke.  In the four years I've lived here, that's the only neighbor I've ever really talked to - we didn't really have any before - but it's kind of nice to know that our presence will be missed by someone in our neighborhood.    

Oh Carpet, how I love thee....

Okay, so a few posts ago I was whining about having to move to another house on here on base right before we PCS to a totally new location.  I have to admit though, the change has not been so terrible.  

First of all, as a concession, the fine people at housing installed new carpet in the house we selected.  Carpet is non-existent in these older units - instead they are floored with mis-matched tile that is impossible to keep clean.  So the fact that they added carpet to the house already made it a much better situation.  

Secondly, my street is POPULATED... with more than just mice.  In fact, I have not seen a single mouse since we moved in (knock on wood).  To be fair, I didn't see a mouse in the old house until my street became a ghost town, so that probably had a lot to do with it.  But it's just nice to have neighbors - really!!

Thirdly, my kitchen is a bit bigger.  Anyone who saw my old kitchen would, I think, agree that there was much to be desired.  I now have a new stove, an extra cabinet and a WORKING dishwasher.  

Fourth, did I mention the carpet?  

Yeah we'll only be here for a few months, but we were able to sort through our belongings and ditch the stuff we didn't use or need and we would've had to do that this summer anyway, so it was nice to get a jump start on that.      

The future does not hold flying cars, it holds......monorails?

I try to be open minded. There's nothing more frustrating than trying to have an intelligent conversation with someone who refuses to see that there is another side to the argument - it doesn't mean that you have to agree with the other side, but just acknowledge and respect the fact that there is another side.

The $787 BILLION stimulus bill that was recently signed into law has been a topic of debate for some time. I think most agree that some kind of stimulus is necessary to help our faltering economy - but how and where that money is spent is still a heated topic of conversation.

Congress was supposed to post the bill 48 hours before it was signed so that the public could view it and see how their hard earned tax dollars were going to be spent. Surprise, surprise - this didn't happen. Why? Because Nancy Pelosi did what she does best - threw a royal hissy fit over some issue with the bill, making it impossible for it to be posted for public view until it was too late.

The result? A $787 billion passage of a stimulus plan that no one in the House or Senate read through completely. As if this weren't bad enough, 8 billion of those dollars are earmarked to the building of a MONORAIL system between Las Vegas and LA!!! Okay, did no one in the US government see that Simpson's episode Marge vs. the Monorail? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

"What's the word?" "Monorail!!"

With all of the problems this economy is facing, why on earth was this pet project tacked on to the stimulus package? An acquaintance of mine informed me that this is a great idea because of the high gas prices and heavy traffic that plague that SW route. Okay, fair enough - but when a plane ticket on Southwest Airlines costs $57.00 to fly between Las Vegas and LA and only takes an hour - I just don't see the immediate need for a monorail system. Even if there were a need for that kind of system, shouldn't the state governments be footing the bill for this?

Monorail at Disneyland - Walt Disney was a genius!!!

There have been some rumors that this stimulus package might not be enough to boost our economy. I just can't imagine how on earth Congress or the President will have the face to come back to us in a few years and demand more money after this debacle. Am I way off base here? Is there something more to this monorail system that I'm just not seeing? I mean, I did see that they're looking at putting one in around Mecca....maybe this is the transportation of the future? If someone has an intelligent argument as to why our hard-earned tax dollars are paying for this - please let me know, I am really struggling to see the other side of this one.

Drama with Military Housing

As I said before, being a military spouse has its good points and its bad points. You would think one of the good points would be relatively "free" housing almost anywhere you go in the world. Think again.

When Erick and I first moved in to Bolling we were moved into the old units that were basically labeled "condemned". The floors were tiled in mismatched industrial linoleum and the walls were an icky buff white that made them look like they were in desperate need of a good scrub down. The light fixtures were equally atrocious. I decided I would do what I could to spruce the place up, so paint was used on the walls and much later, I retiled the floors with peel and stick tile and used carpet remnants and rugs in other areas. For three and half years we have lived in more comfort than would have been possible without those upgrades. (Linoleum is frickin hard to clean). Granted, the ceiling in my kitchen leaks after a shower in bath in the bathroom upstairs. Our windows aren't sealed very well and here lately, we have been having issues with mice - but all in all I have enjoyed my house, mainly because of all the work I put into it.

When the military housing was privatized on Bolling a little over a year ago, there was a mass exodus to move off of base. Everyone living in our neighborhood, Doolittle Park, was told that though we lived in sub-standard housing, we would still be charged the full BAH (Base Housing Allowance) rate. Most privatized companies gave residents the option of moving into a new unit, doing upgrades on their current housing, or charging them less BAH per month as an incentive for staying on base despite the fact that they would be living in condemned housing. This was an outrage - and moving trucks could be seen on every block for the next several months. Erick and I even looked at moving off of base at this point. We ended up staying - housing told us we would not have to change anything back in our current home when we moved and that Doolittle Park would be last on the demolition list and wouldn't be touched until 2012.

Two weeks ago there was a giant trash bin placed in front of one of the houses on my block. Since my last neighbor's departure, there are only two other families living on my street and they were both moved in just several months ago. My initial thought in seeing this gigantic trash bin was that they were beginning to salvage useable materials from these houses and "junking" the rest.

About a week ago, I came home from work to see that they were putting on new doors and windows on that unit and I could tell from the open windows that they were updating the light fixtures as well. As I got out of my car, my nearest neighbors (several houses down) approached me with "Do you know they are going to make us move?" I think I stood there with a look of absolute unbelief on my face for a full minute before I stuttered out, "We're scheduled to PCS (Permanent Change of Station) in July." Imagine my shock when they answered "All of us are." Turns out, housing didn't even inform us of this development - my neighbors were told by the workman that "you aren't going to be living here much longer." They went straight down to the housing office and had it confirmed and then told me.

The next day, housing called Erick and told him they were moving us over one block - not into a new unit, but back into the crap that we are being forced out of. The difference? At least my crap has updates! I called housing and asked them why they were moving us when everyone on my block was scheduled to move in July anyway and why they felt it necessary to start on Doolittle Park when there are two housing areas that have been vacated for YEARS and have not been touched. Their answer was basically, "well, this is coming from the big bosses and we can't do anything about it."

Well, we looked at what they had to offer and we had to demand a house with a fence for the dogs (they weren't going to give us one). They are also going to carpet and give us a concession of one month's rent, so we're dealing. It's just kind of a bummer to move twice within 6 month - but hey, it's the military some folks have to pick up and move after three months of being in a new location, so I guess I should be grateful it's just a move around the corner.

Release the HOUNDS!!!!!!

Apparently my dogs cannot see in the dark....that, or they are just lights out when lights go out. My nearest neighbors moved out the week of Christmas...and apparently their furry little friends moved in to find warmth, shelter and food in the closest place possible...my house.  Yes, I am speaking of another mouse (mice, I should say).   

I awoke a few days after their departure to find that something had been nibbling on the dog food bag stowed away in a cabinet in my dining room.  So, before I left for Christmas vacation in PA, I  set the old school traps and went on my merry way.  I came home to find a crushed little body in a trap but had a sneaking suspicion that there was another mouse still at large.  

So I set another trap and waited.  

Still at large

Sure enough, one of the Ziploc bags that I had used to reseal the dogs food had been nibblethrough...this mouse, however, was not to be caught.  While at Ikea - the most fabulous store on earth - I bought a huge rubbermaid container to stow the dog food in so it would be doubly protected and to drive my furry squatters out in desperation for food.  

The most fabulous store on Earth

For about a week, nothing.  Then, last night I heard from Erick - he was FINALLY getting a flight out of Afghanistan.  I was so excited that in my joy I left every single light on downstairs...something I don't do EVER.  Well at about 4:30 this morning I was awakened by Han wimpering at the stairs.  I rolled over to check the time and thought, "Gee whiz, dog, it's too early to go out" and rolled back over to get some more shut eye.   

Then the howling started.  Luke was bellowing so loud that I was quite happy I didn't have neighbors anymore.  I figured something must be up, so I grabbed my robe and my slippers and ran down the stairs.  My first thought was "Ooops, I left all the lights on!" After that initial shock, I noticed that the dogs were trying to get my attention.  They ran down the hall, through the kitchen and into the dining room....I then realized that they had cornered that elusive rodent.  As soon as I spoke the fateful words "Get it" - I saw a little streak come flying through the kitchen into the living room where I was standing.  Doing my pansy dance and screaming like a little girl, I jumped on the couch.  Luke and Han were on it though.  Before I knew it the mouse was dead - Luke poised over it in a triumphant stance, positioning himself between me and the carcass - Han, turning it over with his nose and his paw to make sure it was dead.

Han and Luke attacking a lollipop - but the attack on the mouse was much the same!!

I was never so proud of my puppies.  Then, I realized that I would have to somehow remove the dead thing off of my floor and discard of its little body.  Thoughts of thick yellow gloves, a dust pan and broom were sweeping through my brain.   As if reading my mind, Han scooped up the mouse from the floor with his mouth and stood at the door - I opened it and he promptly took it to the corner of the yard and dropped it running back in the house for a treat.  Quite obliging of him, I thought.

  

Killing machine

The dogs sleep downstairs, so why they never noticed the mouse before this time escapes me....I must only suppose that leaving the lights on downstairs was the key to their finally noticing our guest.  If there are any more furry little creatures roaming around - they best be warned.  My dogs are highly trained and capable killing machines!!!